pot of dirt on desk
inertia and gravity
serendipitous
inertia and gravity
serendipitous
endless complaining
cancellation promises
still going to buy it
cancellation promises
still going to buy it
fake looking water
low resolution background
preorder cancelled!
unrealistic
Shepard’s run animation
preorder cancelled!
young boy in the vents?
this writing is terrible
preorder cancelled!
teammates always dead
bullets every direction
raining enemies
a Krogan sniper
wielded like a baseball bat
you’re doing it wrong
Waiting for Mass Effect 3 has really been putting a strain on my sanity. I have been pretty much grinding full time to get all my ME2 characters in a row and ready for import. Anytime I am not playing Mass Effect I am thinking about it. These haiku are the result of me trying to be productive and failing.
Shepard at the club
the galaxy’s worst dancer
stick to shooting guns
the galaxy’s worst dancer
stick to shooting guns
Reapers stand no chance
wrath of this female Earthling
her time of the month
wrath of this female Earthling
her time of the month
all sides surrounded
both squad mates casualties
nothing charge can’t fix
both squad mates casualties
nothing charge can’t fix
tough-guy Turian
one come-on line from Femshep
a highschool junior
one come-on line from Femshep
a highschool junior
face covered in blood
overcome by happiness
—only a baby
overcome by happiness
—only a baby
rude and offensive
so vulnerable inside
—but nobody cares
so vulnerable inside
—but nobody cares
soft-spoken fellow
fighting for the galaxy
… crew needed color
fighting for the galaxy
… crew needed color
always cracking jokes—
self-defense mechanism
receding hairline
self-defense mechanism
receding hairline
dresses like a thief
wonders why she can’t come in
a sense of humor?
wonders why she can’t come in
a sense of humor?
Geth infiltrator
totally oblivious
his hilarity
totally oblivious
his hilarity
young and innocent—
but now, hard-boiled and ruthless
schizophrenia
but now, hard-boiled and ruthless
schizophrenia
super genius
engineered perfection
please remove your clothes
engineered perfection
please remove your clothes
courageous doctor
buried in his distant past
—an atrocity
buried in his distant past
—an atrocity
deadly orgasm
Ardat-Yakshi maneuver
—quite literally
Ardat-Yakshi maneuver
—quite literally
the Justicar code
highest Asari concept
on-off like a switch
highest Asari concept
on-off like a switch
fans demand her face
just to be dissapointed?
stick to fantasy
just to be dissapointed?
stick to fantasy
headshot prodigy
“I brought shredder ammo”
keep it to yourself
“I brought shredder ammo”
keep it to yourself
skilled mercenary
cheated death dozens of times
inferno grenade
cheated death dozens of times
inferno grenade
the morning routine
more lengthy every year—
adjusting my tie
more lengthy every year—
adjusting my tie
delayed by traffic
first on the agenda
the morning tea time
first on the agenda
the morning tea time
animal planet
he finds less interesting
than the passing cars
he finds less interesting
than the passing cars
yesterday’s outfit
anxious to wear it again
some time must elapse
anxious to wear it again
some time must elapse
healthy appetite
only ten minutes later
craving satisfied
only ten minutes later
craving satisfied
this buffalo sauce
exceeding expectations
taste buds are burning
exceeding expectations
taste buds are burning
Anticipation
different from my childhood
I hate Christmas now
different from my childhood
I hate Christmas now
money spent on gifts
can’t decide which I hate more
time spent wrapping gifts
can’t decide which I hate more
time spent wrapping gifts
a Chipotle trip
unforeseen tea benefit
free lemons
unforeseen tea benefit
free lemons
ten for ten dollars
solution to world hunger?
microwave required
solution to world hunger?
microwave required
“good source of protein”
also tripolyphosphate
I am not concerned
also tripolyphosphate
I am not concerned
a ringing doorbell
overcome by excitment—
telemarketer
overcome by excitment—
telemarketer
some tea for dinner
Quasi doesn’t understand
take another sip
Quasi doesn’t understand
take another sip
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